Heroic Women are outing sexual harassers and rocking global industries (Movies, VR & AR, Science…
Heroic Women are outing sexual harassers and rocking global industries (Movies, VR & AR, Science, Technology, and Politics) and only foolish men are fighting back. (Also American’s expect serial sexual harasser Donald Trump to die in office.)
by Micah Blumberg
As someone put it, “it’s the sound of change. It’s the sound of female empowerment. Of the Earth shattering and building supporting environments to denounce this. Him. And every single one of them who behaves inappropriately. It’s the beginning of the Future. A future that, unfortunately, he didn’t forecast.”
Appallingly some men are attacking women, instead of recognizing women as the heroes that they are for fighting back against this global epidemic of sexual harassment they are mischaracterizing this as a rise of whiny victims.
In reality these women who are fighting back are heroes, while the men who complain are the one’s playing the victims. To put it another way, if a man complains about the rise of a victim culture it’s because he’s a sexual predator. Watch out!
Example 1: Felix Lanzalaco for instance openly admits on social media that he grabs women without their consent, and says he’s had no complaints so far. Are there any women willing to come forward to complain about this man? Or do you agree with Felix that it’s okay because he is young and good looking?
In a conversation I had with Felix Lanzalaco he openly admits that he grabs women without their consent.
- Felix is a Sales and Tech research at LanzaLAB, a Former Research Officer at Psychology Cares Scotland, previously studied Mathematics at The Open University, he also Studied Computer Science, Physics at University of Glasgow. Went to Shawlands Academy, Lives in Glasgow, United Kingdom, and he’s From Glasgow, United Kingdom lanzalaco.org network.nature.com/profile/lanzalaco lifeboat.com/ex/bios.felix.lanzalaco plus.google.com/118184936255132270234/about soundcloud.com/brainhopper/sets
The full story is that this was revealed in a Facebook chat that myself and others had with Felix. It started with his post about how he had been blocked by Matt lygate. I started reading to see if I could understand why.
Felix: Well I have just been blocked by Matt lygate for making my dislike clear about him encouraging the new wave of internet victim culture. I knew Matt from doing the soundsystem at their outdoor gigs years ago and he does excellent work promoting creativity in Glasgow arts scene. But in general I have found a pattern of not getting on with certain overliberal arty types who have strong personalities. Primarily because they post what seems to me quite often a lot of pish dressed up as issues of debate, and they have very thin skin when challenged, especially when challenged with statistics, funny memes, their own friends agreeing with then getting friendly with me and clear rebuttal with authoritative sources like experts. They start debates but its not a real debate, more of an online echo chamber for sensitive over-inflated egos.
I am thinking it might be an idea to go through my friends list and in advance just disconnect from anybody I don’t take that seriously on an intellectual level, but who appear to take themselves far too seriously and regularly start political types of debates. If we are online and start debates, then expect to be able to handle a challenge.
Felix Lanzalaco That does not include you jace, not that you dont have serious things to say of course. This is more about fragile egos who regularly start debates on politically debatable topics they are sure they will prevail and rally on, but cannot handle it going another way. Rowan sol from the Edinburgh tekno scene was another one it did not end well with.
Jace Syntax What was your take on the me too movement then?
Barry Longyear Don’t toss those who disagree, only those who become disagreeable.
Felix Lanzalaco exactly, i dont think I was being totally disagreeable. i always try to balance out with what i think are the positive points about that person or the issue at hand.
Felix Lanzalaco there are genuine issues, but the “me too” aspect has to be viewed entirely in the context of the growing online victim culture or it cannot be understood why some of have a problem with in. In such a culture we find that many people are not trying to solve their problems. They are often unreasonable, over-entitled and attention seeking. Not only that it seems a generation of thin skinned millennials are latching on to this. Every couple of months it changes and we get another installment of this. See this to understand why its not to be encouraged.
Jace Syntax I can see why he deleted you
Felix Lanzalaco it was more to do with this meme i generated
so now #metoo is the viral meme. Victim mentality on the periphery of social media, as predicted now becomes the dominant easy fix to gain social status. Not…
Felix Lanzalaco you cant possibly understand in 2 minutes as it would take 10 minutes to watch the above video i posted which explains my position. And also another 10 minutes for this one. Victim culture is a terrible social development. It has always been a bad thing throughout history and a very poor way to solve the actual issues raised. Because peoples first position is to be entrenched and emotional rather than be rational about solutions to the issues. And the social climate generated is a latch on victim culture, which is what we are seeing right now.
Felix Lanzalaco What is common to all victim cultures is people are so utterly convinced about the issues they lose their ability to be reasonable and cannot tolerate any debate or difference of opinion. Closing down free speech is usually the first thing that happens. It always seems right, but due to victim mentality not actually engaging in good inner and self problem solving. i.e. their own role in the problems. To actually say the victim or victims has some role in the problems is the one taboo thing. So for the victims because of the lack of reflection every surround issue becomes projected externally on to outside events. The problem is always outside. Due to poor internal problem solving and not changing there is always an external issue and so on. The pattern is basically endless problems and always the road to increasing over-entitlement and control over others. Whether in one person or entire sets of people empathizing with each other.
Karen Whyte I understand this, yes. Especially confonting in a calm manner but then the other person shutting down. I feel they shut down because guilt may arise in the processing of the problem first befor the solution comes.
Felix Lanzalaco very often just the mind cannot handle it regardless of guilt or not. Somtimes extra time required, or a break from the issue but not too long a break.
Matt Lygate Why do you have an opinion in how other people deal with abuse?
Felix Lanzalaco Matt Lygate religious and family background, then studying psychology later. Quite regularly I find its not that simple, that the victim was not antagonizing the situation by being over-entitled, passive aggressive or playing their own games. There really are not that many completely abusive people in society. They are actually quite rare. But people with victim mentality, can be plentiful so we need to be more carefull about just accepting what they say.
Matt Lygate i agree when it comes to accusations about individuals. Then you have to be careful. but when someone is expressing an emotion, you are not their gatekeeper or judge on why they feel that way or how they should deal with it. I accept all the theory behind victimhood and how people disempower themselves by manifesting reasons that stop them doing what they want. But no-one is saying that in Me Too. Women are not saying they are powerless to deal with it or cant leave the house due to fear. They ARE dealing with it daily. The point is to highlight the fact that they shouldnt fucking have to. For that to happen they need male support not antagonistic males claiming to understand their psychology and emotions better than they do. If you are not an abuser and can honestly say you have never mistreated another human being then good for you. Keep it up. This is not about you so why get so wound up.
You have to chose your stance. either you are saying women shouldn’t play victim because it disempowers them. In which case they already know that and a sarcastic male telling them that isnt helping. Or you are saying I am sick of hearing all this abuse stuff and I wish they would shut up and talk to a professional. the fact it bothers you so much psychologically would imply you are being triggered by the subject of abuse which means you are repressing something as others are expressing something
Felix Lanzalaco I am more having a go at the PC-victim culture in general. Obviously there are actual real problems. Child abuse, rape and prolonged psychological abuse etc. All dealt with already but lets not extend this into minor stuff. Most of what we see with the weinstein case is going to blow over. Taken into context of him being an OTT womanizer rather than a pattern of any of the above. I would bet in the end they dont actually find evidence for any serious case.
Matt Lygate of course they wont find evidence. Doesn’t mean he isnt a rapist. Multiple accounts say he is but the judicial system is racked against rape victims particularly those who have taken some time to pluck up the courage to come forward. Unless you literally have his dna still inside you or magically have some film footage, how exactly can you prove he raped you. What you are doing is saying that all the me too posts are about ‘minor stuff’. You clearly havent read the same posts I have or if you have your idea of what is ‘minor’ is set totally different. Also to blanket say all the me too campaign is a bout PC victim minor stuff shows your own bias towards your opinion of sexual abuse claims. Obviously in such a massive campaign maybe a lot of people are complaining about being sleazed on in clubs, touched up by guys walking past, having dicks exposed to them unwillingly on the street and in messages — all of this you probably call ‘minor’ but is the foundation of a culture and your response to that proves that culture by calling it ‘minor’
Felix Lanzalaco no need to repress, i know everything i have been through. Just as I stated, the religious background i had before going atheist is a victim culture. Then more of it in other areas i cannot mention online. At a certain stage you study it, and see one thing, and you should note this. The human mind will very easily grasp onto copying others with victim status, if it enables them to get something. i.e. “me too” actually means just that. its a terrible meme, as its far too enabling. And next it will be something else. Just wait and see. I predict this social phenomena is going to get crazier, you can see the pattern growing over the last few years. But real hard abusers, they are very rare, you wont see that growing. So there is a disconnect between real abuse, and the growing social trends we see.
Felix Lanzalaco Matt Lygate that was the judicial system 10 years ago. Its different these days. This is another problem, so many things people think are problems due to the press reporting exceptions have actually changed quietly and they dont know. I read the details of the case and i think this is the trend.. she blatantly lied several times and finally got caught by recordings and GPS tracking she was not aware off. She has been jailed for a good reason, the judges are well aware of peoples lives being ruined by false allegations
Felix Lanzalaco Well anyway hopefully it’s just a phase that’s not going to last. Another year or two of this and most people will reject it.
James Grist i doubt that very much. victim culture is here to stay, and if somehow its repulsed in its current guise, then it will be repackaged and remarketed repeatedly until a new workable version is found.
Felix Lanzalaco Ach ! Give us hope..even fake hope !
Matt Lygate Glad you men have sorted it all out and are so well adjusted emotionally
Marion Hunter Felix, I’m not sure why you deemed it necessary to make an example of Matt. Was naming him personally necessary? I think the second paragraph would be perfectly adequate to raise an issue.
Felix Lanzalaco well I am not that great at being concise
Karen Frondigoun I personally don’t think that showing solidarity with survivors of sexual abuse is a bad thing. I posted me too, not with a story because my story is do old and well known I didn’t feel the need. I am not playing a victim, or playing into a victim culture as you call it. Sexual abuse and sexual discrimination are real issue that LOTS of people have to deal with and it doesn’t just go away if you take a couple if pills. Society has historically and systematically silenced people who speak up. I understand where you are coming from but I feel that your objection is somewhat missing the point.
Karen Frondigoun People who have suffered from sexual abuse are encouraged to refer to themselves as survivors, rather than victims for exactly the reasons that you are pointing out.
Felix Lanzalaco I am very aware of these issues as it has affected people close to me over prolonged periods. I also helped design vignettes for educating child sex offenders in one of the psychology projects I worked on. I can even tell you some psychological models of abuse and recovery stages. I was telling these to matt if you check out the thread. The serious problems are rape, child sexual abuse and systematic or prolonged abuse. Most of which are already well dealt with in society as we have seen with all the retrospective charging of leading figures. Now as part of the spread of victim culture we encourage people to take part in this trickle down installment to minor issues. If it has been serious enough that somebody is a survivor, then even survivor mentality is different from all this. Most of what I see in my feed, is so minor obvious attention getting nonsense.. people need to really shut up. Or at least I will be re-organizing my media so I dont see it.
Felix Lanzalaco who has not been assaulted in some way ? Even I have endured mild sexual assault gasp during a vulnerable time by somebody bigger. yes even me in younger days. But that was mild, just another one of lifes many little problems. Not rape, not serious. Absolutely nothing in the scheme of what adults face. Nowhere near close to racism which is far more opressive. But even that has never been that terrible. being ripped off, or other types of abuse or life problems. How many of those do we have in a decade.. countless .. Its all about perception in the end. We all have problems of all kinds.
Felix Lanzalaco What actual problems are being solved by all these online confessions ? The problem of not having enough social media attention it seems. This whole thing arose from Hollywood. Millionaire performers who brushed somebody off and still were well enough to stay on the movie project and make professional performances, taking home enormous paychecks and never calling the police. There are very real problems that you mention, but what I see comes across as more performance.
Felix Lanzalaco I can feel another problem coming on.. let’s find pills..those were the days.. but too much withdrawal..confessions instead ? Mmm..good for a bit…now I need more attention…sit and relax for a while, think about better perspectives..like it’s amazing we are even here..on a spinning rock..still part ape..yes that helps
Karen Frondigoun So if you are a millionaire, managed to perform your job professionally or didn’t call the police then the problem is not ‘major’? I rarely find myself in a position, defending Hollywood but the fact is that actors are people too and often their whole life’s are played out for the public to see. The fact that ‘even you’ have been assaulted in some way, does not mean that assault is acceptable. I don’t know what you see on your feed, I have only read a couple of articles and don’t know the depths of the details. What seems to be coming out if this is that the movie business is having its dirty laundry aired, and this is often the beginning of change. The #metoo campaign, as I understand it, is simply about showing solidarity and making it extremely public how prevalent and common a problem it is, particularly among women. You are very quick to generalise. I felt quite attacked by your initial post, because I showed my solidarity, I acknowledged that I too have experienced abuse. I think the essence of this post is about the you getting attention because Matt has shown his anger by unfriending you. Are you not now participating in this ‘victim culture’ you are so fervently decrying?
Felix Lanzalaco Karen Frondigoun well every social interaction requires attention of some sort.. its whether there is a pattern of requiring attention for its own sake of self affirmation rather than to solve a problem, make decisions, statements that need to be made,gather ideas.. discuss.. i.e. actually try to do something constructive and be open to real interaction. yes something constructive has come out of this post in that I have a clearer plan what to do next. My partner confirmed that she too had found it necessary to remove certain IRL friends for similiar reasons, because people cannot be compatible in every platform. Sometimes better to control things a bit with feed preferences etc before you fall out with them online.
Felix Lanzalaco definitely do not think those are major problems. Serious health issues, grinding poverty, systematic prolonged abuse,growing up in backwards cultures, warmongering.. Those are real problems. The internets becoming awash with increasingly minor shit touted as terrible that definitely not that bad. Somebody tried to force themselves onto me once, and i found it hard to get them off me. so what..as if that is a big deal. thats just crazy to think its so bad.. but if everybody around me is going.. oh thats terrible, thats unacceptable, sure i might start to believe it. But to me its just a bad week and get on with it. Rape, child abuse. Yes in the sex abuse area now those are a big deal, because those actually invade a persons biology or cause a childs developing identity and outlook to get screwed up long term.
Felix Lanzalaco in the current times, far more people should be checking this lecture out and getting a better perspective on reality. Can you imagine what would happen if every man started breaking up online at the violence or hardship endured between us. Now that would really be something for metoo… that could cause a tidal wave on social media.. yet it almost never happens. Reason is its actually a non issue and something most men dealt with, got stoic, rational and practical about it all at a young age, realised the potential apes that we are and have various plans of action prepared for that. Even if how to run fast. its all pragmatic. And importantly, I dont really think men in general expect as much. As a result our perspective does not feel violated so easily and everything in life becomes a bonus. Again its explained in the lecture.
Karen Frondigoun I think there is a lot of sense to what he is saying, however how helpful a highly educated white man telling Black and Hispanic single mothers to just get over it, and rise above in such a patronising fashion is is somewhat debatable. I too have had a couple of experiences that fell short of rape and that weren’t really major issues and I refused to become a victim and did nothing about them. It was only in my mid/late twenties that I actually realised that the incident that had occurred when I was 8 had gad a significant negative effect on me. I had some major trust issues that I had never recognized. What is more I had some major guilt issues as I realised that other children were very likely at risk of much more serious attacks (I was savvy and balshy which had minimized my risk) and that my silence had possibly enabled this guy to continue. I am not looking for sympathy, I have dealt with all those feelings now but I recognize that everyone deals with things differently and not everyone is as resilient at me at the age of 8, 12, 18 and 26 which are all the times in my life when someone has done something to me that could be construed as a sexual attack but that I have never deemed serious enough to persue any further. Men do not have to deal with female predators as regularly in society, as women have to deal with male predators and that is a fact. From what I saw of Matt’s post he was owning a time when he had been perceived as a predator and that is an extremely brave thing to do. Was it simply for some attention, probably. Isthat a terrier thing? Not really. If more men would actually examine their past behaviors when they know they have been borderline abusive and accept this as bad behavior and discuss it with other men then maybe this type of behavior would become less acceptable. That is what I took from Matt’s story. If you told him he was just playing a victim and that he should shut up and get over it then I can understand why he might have blocked you. It does appear however that Matt has removed himself from fb, maybe because of what you said to him and you are in fb moaning about Matt blocking you. I think that you have possibly over reacted, or reacted in a way that was intentionally antagonistic to a post that was quite clearly heartfelt. If you and Matt are real life friends I hope you still are after this.
Felix Lanzalaco there is a difference between child abuse, rape which are already well dealt with in society-law and the metoo campaign. Rape is so well dealt with men are getting locked up often without the usual standard of evidence required for other crimes. Child abuse will have families broken up by authorities at just the slightest hint of wrongdoing. This is well taken care off and has been for over ten years. End of story. The metoo campaign is mostly about which adults got groped but not seriously enough for police action. An extension of all the other lefty USA causes setup in league with charities to enable lawyers to sue more people. This is one of the reasons for the rise in victim culture, the fact US citizens can generate income from being offended, or put upon in even the slightest way. The result of all this has is raising a generation with victim mentality, gradual closing down of free speech and people being so politically correct that scientists cannot even research many subjects for fear of lawsuits.
Felix Lanzalaco We really dont need all this solidarity online for such issues. not for being groped as an adult. Whats going to be next ? being traumatized by all the women who ever used a man as cash generator or useful DIY tool ? As Peterson states, where doesit end. There are many programs for race such as affirmative action which actually discriminate against whites. I was mentioning male outlook previously, when do you ever see the average man do this solidarity ? Well it happened recently for veterans suicide awareness and i made my contribution in that. Yes thats surviving, war, friends being blown apart. Vets being blown apart. Hard to imagine and still only a fraction are affected.
Felix Lanzalaco The rest of this problem i see as just not instilling enough perspective and character building. Kids are just not exposed to enough rough and tumble in the environment.. not enough stoic outlook. not made to completely manage their own projects. So find it harder to deal with setbacks as adults, where they find PC culture also enables them to be victims for cash/attention or tear themselves up over the slightest thing. I doubt matt closed his FB account for what i said. Probably he flouted some facebook rule somewhere. Yes facebook curtail many peoples free speech nowadays due to the rise of this PC culture. But if he did, that is just totally OTT and actually proves what i am saying.
Felix Lanzalaco Lastly I do think there is a practical side to people mentioning child abuse. For a start sometimes it needs to be stated why one might behave differently or has acted towards certain people, or has a particular social problem people have noticed. Thishelps to increase understanding. However metoo as far as i could see, this campaign is not about child abuse or even rape. Mostly its for all those ladies complaining about being propositioned or touched by somebody they did not fancy. For all those times, there are many more quite happy the right person did. Its all about perspective. I bet they will have a different perspective on who can get a bit shirty when they are 40 or 50. Weinstein is an ugly one, so probably has to persist more. if he was a tom cruise or brad pitt do you think this would be such a problem ?
James Grist be glad of ‘mansplaining’. Its the reason you’re in a well heated, solid modern house with light at night and able to send messages, photos and vids to the other side of the world in a second. Else you and most people would be in a cave or a mudhut, the best form of writing would be chalk on a wall or a stick in the sand. Its one crucial difference between the human species and other animals.
Felix Lanzalaco Matt Lygate lol alpha male. aspirations at 50 lol.. I am lower beta . Version type flakeynerd, old fashioned. Matt you are the alpha male personified. peacock feathers on full blast, take care of everything socially, organize larger resources, lead others, delegate, stay cool headed, keep abreast of and encapsulate new trends.
Felix Lanzalaco Karen Frondigoun well sure but none of my written works are ever that concise.. in debates one explains, tries to persuade, makes points. this is nothing I have only explained a fraction of what I dont like about PC-VIctim culture. There are many more facets than what i mentioned. It reached a point with me last year, and many others. Check these threads or even matts, I am not on my own with this as matt seems to imply.
Felix Lanzalaco Well I have too many other battles so i guess laying low and curating social media is the only way to weather it, till everybody else out there has had enough of the endless drama.. Yes this drama will grow, and get crazier because there is a growing pattern to this. could always just mock it, but then have to deal with all this !
James Grist I think modern civ would soon fall apart if men stopped communicating about non-trivial things.
Karen Frondigoun Ok, my bad I will rephrase. Mansplaining, is a bad and quite sexist comment. What I was trying to say quickly is that there was a large amount of dictation to me on the subject where you took a stance that seemed very much to assume that you had a much better grasp and understanding of the subjects, your dictation was extremely lengthy, always assuming that you were ‘correct’ and more than a little patronizing throughout. You failed to directly tackle the actual (albeit simple) ctitique I did give on your 3rd party lecture which you are posing as fact, when it is quite clearly (professional and educated) conjecture and your underlying disdain for people who are disagreeing with you is blatantly apparent. At no point did I feel that you were ‘debating’ with me. Lecturing, yes, debating no.
Karen Frondigoun Also, just to clarify, the reason why your lengthy lecture seemed so patronizing is that you made a statement early on that you had one experience of sexual harassment which you deemed a non event therefore implying that you had little or no insight in…See More
James Grist “purely academic and lacking the underlying insight of experience.”
Everyone has experiences that can be interpreted as victimhood. But its to a large degree relative. A thoroughly pampered kid of millionaires will cry if they think they didn’t get enough icecream, while a slave child will work for years in miserable conditions w/o feeling of debilitating persecution.
One thing that makes it hard to take the western sjw victim culture seriously is that whatever victimization is happening in the west, it is happening far worse in other parts of the world such as India, Pakistan, China, Africa where humans live & work in poor conditions. sjw concern for these people is at best well below what it should be if their concerns for victims was genuine, and at worst nil. sjws seem more concerned about how they themselves are being victimized by other people having different opinions to them on fb.
Felix Lanzalaco Karen Frondigoun I am not underplaying it. I am simply saying that somebody forcing themselves on to me was not that stressful. I mean its just somebody touching you and getting a wee bit forceful because they like you, but you dont like them in this way. Whats the worst that can happen, getting the cold or flu of them ? there is always something you can do. As an adult in the UK how is this anywhere near as stressfull dealing with poverty, racism, or prolonged conflict such as threats, gangs, weapons being pulled out. Or actual physical assults. The latter is something most men up till recently used to deal with and might explain the difference in reactions. Having much rougher experiences might actually might be a good thing, as it appears to toughen up our perspective a bit about whats worth getting that fussed about.
Felix Lanzalaco well I am not blocking anybody or ever did. The point of this thread is to figure out what to do. it seems that facebook allows you to unfollow somebodies posts if they just make you think “oh not again”.
Felix Lanzalaco James Grist and that explains well another reason i dislike victim culture extremely. Victim psychology is something dormant in the human psyche and it can come to rise over anything basically. Well we are seeing this now. The people doing this then become so absorbed they demand attention for all their minor shit, attention which should be going to real and pressing problems
Felix Lanzalaco I did tackle your critique, as you were saying because he is white middle class USA he cant be taken seriously. Well I dont buy into a lot of this, considering all the long standing programs in the USA to equalize the social balance. Some say that its gone so far, jobs now go to other ethnicity etc irregardless of merit. Well I mentioned that already so is this not addressing that issue ?
Felix Lanzalaco And here is another problem. I am finding that most of these trendy lefty issues, if you actually research or look at harder data are non issues. They were dealt with already, just the press didnt tell you in their attempt to make massive deal about exceptions. Thats why i tend to look at statistics for any issue, just to see if it is a real issue anymore. But if I dare to question these sacred issues, or mention any hard data its almost hysterical how people react. Why ? see this to understand why
Karen Frondigoun Me saying that what he is saying isn’t helpful is quite different to me saying it shouldn’t be taken seriously. Your whole argument centre’s around the fact that #metoo is playing into this ‘victim culture’ you so fervently talk about. However the reality is that there are still many more sexual attacks and instances of sexual harrassment that go unreported or unchallenged for fear of not being believed, being demonized, losing status ETC. That is the point. No it is not OK to blow a trivial issue out of proportion for the sake of it. No one is saying that it is. I very much doubt that what Matt experienced when he was a teenager was trivial to anyone involved at the time, being accused of rape etc. Yes, the situation with the police is better than it once was. I don’t think that anybody but you is implying that there are not worse things that occur in other countries. Now you seem to he saying that if more people in general were subjected to more serious attacks that they would deal with it better because they would be more hardy! FUCK SAKE MAN, WTF! If you didn’t find it extremely scary having someone try to force them self on to you then good for YOU, that is not the consensus from anecdotal reports. You are now so far off topic in what seems like an attempt to bury the original points in a much larger argument that only seems actually relevant to you and one other self confessed sexist on this thread. I AM now getting fed up reading all your detail because I don’t think it is actually hanging together to support the points you are trying to get across and what’s more you are sounding more and more unpleasant with each one.
Micah Blumberg Felix I think your perspective on this topic is totally wack. me too is not a club for victims, its a club for heroes who are tired of taking shit from predators and are fighting back, thats not a victim club, thats an army, saying FUCK YOU to rape, sexual assault, murder, child rape, sexual molestation, and other gender based assaults and other inappropriate and illegal behaviors. Something is wrong with your brain’s file on this topic because you are missing the bigger picture for the teeny illusion your brain concocted about this being a victim party, you are the victim here.
Felix Lanzalaco Yes, well you again are choosing to take the extremely illegal aspects already overtly well dealt with law, institutions and society LONG AGO. You are confusing it with what this is all about, that we are getting in the press and social media now. Which is something like this “ somebody I didnt fancy as he was ugly (might have been different if he wasnt). tried to proposition me. groped me as an adult, or tried to co-erce me into a massage. i still had my head together after, did excellent performances and made a million bucks or so. i even had a few more flings with the guy later while not calling the police or even mentioning it before. but now everybody is complaining about every slight thing online and getting praised, It can include “me too” as a victim. In fact lets just explore even more non issues and make confessions. Such as were you a bit too forcefull, and said the wrong thing while trying to get the girl your were dating for two months to have sex. Sound crazy ? Thats what i am seeing and thats what the problem is.
Felix Lanzalaco I am not a victim of PC culture. This is my platform to problem solve it, and yes interesting how some of the culprits appeared here without me naming them. I have taken clear steps to deal with it. Dont have to unfriend, but yes, the solution is to unfollow feeds of people who support and post about this, or next months installment. It will be something else, then something else.
Micah Blumberg again your perspective on this topic is the warped elephant in the room, maybe you have some hidden issue that gives you this strange distortion? do you normally feel anger towards women in general? frustration towards women? do you have negative thoughts about women? are you that person who catcalls women or grabs women without consent is that why you have this extremely warped and fucked up view on this topic?
Felix Lanzalaco: no, none of the above. But yes, i do grab without consent and so far had no complaints, its always well received so far. Maybe now I am getting older and uglier it wont be. See is all in the perspective of the woman i think. These directors are not exactly brad pitt or tom cruise. But you know i do use common sense that there is something happening between us before i ever did anything like that. Its called making a move and breaking the tension ! But as for this. Maybe not in every case, but i bet its primarily sour grapes for these women because they didnt get the career break they hoped for, or the director didnt maintain any relationship with them afterward.
Felix Lanzalaco what are you saying men should just ask women before they do anything now. well thats a whole new one to me and probably every guy i know.
Felix Lanzalaco So its basically just mild nonsense. But now its part of victim culture. Well how about we just create a campaign for every time we had our head twisted by passive aggression. Or were used by women for material things. Or were rejected by women for fickle reasons. were ignored by somebody important. Got strung along by a story or prank. Somebody was too close minded to us. Were not gracious enough in work situations. etc. Think thats crazy. If we follow Victim-PC culture that appears to be the way things are going.
Murray You don’t really know me, and I don’t really know you, but asking a woman if it’s OK to touch/kiss/have sex/”do anything” with her seems like the minimum of respect to me. Seems not to you given your proud admission of touching without consent. Would you feel it wasn’t a big deal if you were to be touched sexually by another man? Are you really drawing equivalency between having your feelings hurt and sexual assault?
Felix Lanzalaco well its a new one to me. I never heard of asking first not in scotland anyway. Is it some new thing since the turn of the century ? Usually its implicitly understood in whats going on. And as far as i know thats what all my other male friends have done. Like i say i never had a problem yet, never had a slap. But of course there is all the chatting up and eye contact etc, mentioning how you feel first, you can sense what is going well, then make your move ! Sexual assault, its usually that move which has led to a hot night or further relationships.
Murray: No Felix, it’s not something new. As a scientist, I’d have thought you’d be far more interested in explicit rather than implicit understandings of boundaries. Would you feel it acceptable to be touched sexually by another man without your consent?
Felix Lanzalaco its all a matter of perspective. Think about it. If anybody punches you, very hard.. now that is damaging no matter who does it. But if somebody makes a sexual advance and is the womans acceptable type its all wonderfull. But if not acceptable then its the crime of the century. Dont you think philosophically that is a bit weird ? A crime is usually applicable in a general sense
Felix Lanzalaco Murray well it depends on the context. actually elsewhere on this thread I have explained that this has happened to me. And i didntt really like it. But for that to be some terrible thing. I mean people need to get a grip. What harm is done. What i might catch the cold because I was touched. Well I can get that from a PIN keypad. Logically and physically its all a matter of perspective.
Felix Lanzalaco Its unpleasant for a short while, just like loads of other things in life. Imagine if we had a metoo campaign for every unpleasant thing in life. Well I think thats the way things are going, victim culture always needs its next thing to complain about
Murray Everything is a matter of perspective. Ours is clearly different in this respect. I think it wrong that men, or women for that matter (it’s almost always men), should feel it acceptable to sexually intimidate the opposite sex. You may not feel that your actions fit that description, and perhaps in those situations the feeling was mutual, but it’s not up to you to decide whether your advances were welcome or not.
Felix Lanzalaco well i can decide that based on how everything went obviously. Why is everybody so touchy feely these days. Its just some groupthink we copied. Admit it. Your younger days were in the 90s i presume. Did we all go around asking politely everytime we made advances. Well if that happened i didnt see it at all. People dropped pills, out their head, touched and grabbed each other. Come on, you are a DJ you know this was happening. All this we are seeing now is just manufactured bullshit people swallowed out of fear of not standing out as old fashioned.
Murray I know some women, you probably do too, who have experienced sexual harassment. The metoo thing highlighted how prevalent it is. Dismissing it as “victim culture” doesn’t mean it didn’t happen, nor that it was demeaning, threatening, damaging for those who experienced it. It’s easy to dismiss as “victim culture” for people who need to “get a grip” when you’re not the one on the receiving end of it, day after day.
Felix Lanzalaco day after day constitutes systematic harassment and the law well covers that one under stalking legislation already. This isnt about day after day at all.
Murray My younger days were in the 80’s. I am a DJ. Those things happened. That doesn’t make them right. Society evolves to right the wrongs of previous generations. We once thought slavery was acceptable.
Murray It is about day after day
Felix Lanzalaco Murray well finally somebody admits we all used to do it !
Murray We used to hang people too
Felix Lanzalaco yeh, hardly comparable. intent to love vs intent to kill
Murray Intent to get laid is not intent to love
Felix Lanzalaco well ok, but there is always that element of strong liking. so its still hardly comparable
Murray It’s totally comparable. Social mores change. We used to think it was OK to have slaves, indentured servants, to hang thieves, to force women to have sex with their husbands, all sorts. My point is, that just because it was legal, common even, doesn’t make it right. I accept that it’s dangerous to judge past generations on current morals but that’s no reason to excuse actions that are oppressive now because they once were deemed OK (by the old, white men who were/are in power)
Felix Lanzalaco I cant believe all this. you are just following the Political correct crowd from the USA.. Thats just libel culture to get cash out of someone. Thats where it comes from. Thats why it is not ok now. Nobody used to complain, except those cases where the women didnt fancy the guy. Not every social idea has actually stood the test of time. How far does this go ? OK how about risking to answer something that was not spoon fed to society by groupthink.. is it OK to grab your girlfriend or wife without asking ? i.e. She is doing the dishes and you go up and put your hand up her blouse ?
Felix Lanzalaco And you are a DJ as well murray. Its weird that all these heated debates and fallouts over these issues are with DJ’s. I mean thats four now. Is this because DJ’s are at the cutting social edge where people are in sexual meetup scenarios ?
Murray Hahahaha. This isn’t heated and I don’t think we’re falling out? I hope not anyway. Aren’t we just discussing a difference of opinion?No, it’s because I care about people. I’m a social scientist, economist and marketing consultant, and was all three long before I was a DJ. Your comments seem to me to be dripping in privilege Felix. I’m guessing that you can’t see the way women, and men, are oppressed by physical and sexual predation because it doesn’t, or hasn’t yet, happened to you. I don’t ‘grab’ my wife, with or without asking. I wouldn’t put my hand up anyone’s blouse or skirt without asking. It would never occur to me.
Felix Lanzalaco Murray lol, well I do and its always well received so far. I call it “grabbing the woman” and its always been fun for both sides. well this isnt heated but this saga started with matt lygate, then jace syntax defriended me. And not long ago Rowan Sol went in a huff and blocked me,different issue though. But all scottish Djs so a weird pattern.
Murray Have you considered that you might be the consistent thread in this pattern?
Murray You make an interesting point about DJ’s being at the cutting edge of social interaction, sexual or otherwise (personally, I don’t think of clubs as hook-up places, just dancing places). Perhaps we are more aware of the negative aspects of male predation in these environments.
Murray The best, most successful clubs have a zero tolerance policy to the kind of sexual predation activity you seem to think is “normal”. Most people I know, male or female, want to go out to a club to dance and have fun without the threat of being felt up, or worse, by a stranger.
Felix Lanzalaco well i just called my partner and she thinks its totally ridiculous about the kitchen scenario. i.e. Totally crazy that men should ask before grabbing their partner.
Felix Lanzalaco And even in meetups she stated. If both people know what is going on. i.e. with common sense that they are chatting each other up with a view to you know what, then touching each other up is not a big deal. But what you are saying might be a generational thing. However our generation of women mostly dont appear to have a major problem with it.
Another man, on another post, but the same topic, whose name is Noah Rogers wrote “I’m a bit confused. 1. Getting flirted-with, or hit-on, is part of life, nothing illegal about it. 2. Threatening a co-worker or employee with HR repercussions or firing, already illegal. 3. Once, my dick and balls were grabbed by a drunk girl and I punched her in the face hard enough she fell backwards; it was hilarious. 4. I think a swift kick to the nuts can solve most of these “sexual harassment” issues… but most of the feminist stuff I hear in the news like unequal pay has already been illegal for 50+ years, and most of the feminists seem to be uneducated enough not to know about these basic laws, so my recommendation is A. swift kicks to the nuts if you’re groped, not illegal, B. upload to youtube and humiliate repeat harassers, C. lawsuits… There, have I solved anything?”
To Noah I wrote:
I think your comment was offensive, but at the same time, understanding your perspective means that I realize it would be hard to explain to you why its offensive.
Lets start with the idea that women experience reality different from how men experience reality.
You don’t see it because you have the privilege, the male privilege that women don’t have. Males do not have nearly as many males trying to hit on them, eventually.
One friend of mine who is a woman said that almost all the men in her life eventually tried to hit on her, young, old, fat, skinny, almost 99 percent of them EVENTUALLY hit on her, and often inappropriately.
Hitting on someone can be illegal, hitting on someone can be harassing, it can be classified as sexual harassment, it can be in appropriate, it can be wrong. I think you are too much in your own bubble.
Then you made some really inappropriate comments about asking women to fight back, physically, I think a lot of professional women want to be able to solve problems without needing to kick a man. And proposing violence as a solution can lead to arrests for the women involved, and more violence. What if he hits back? You’re comments are really socially irresponsible in that way.
Finally you are doing mansplaining, which is this thing men do over and over again where they get on a soapbox and they start lecturing to women, it demeaning to women, its self centered ignorance.
Who are you to walk in with your male privilege purporting to solve sexual harassment with a few words?
Maybe women (or men) should start wearing hidden body cameras to catch powerful abusive men (or women) in the act of sexual harassment? Maybe women (or men) should start to record telephone calls? Maybe women (and men) should start to save the chats where sexual harassment is happening, and join women’s or victims groups and report what happened to trusted friends or more broadly in secret women’s groups, so that other women (or men) are not the next victim of that person. After all, if you are not his first victim, you won’t be his last.
Don’t be proud of sexual harassment that’s sick. Don’t lie about it like some VR companies and Venture Capitalists and Movie Producers like Weinstein did, that also shows sickness. Admit that you have done wrong, acknowledge that it’s shameful to violate the safe space of women and other people without their consent.
If a person has done wrong to another human being, or to multiple human beings. The right thing to do is to acknowledge the truth, the full truth, to acknowledge that its a shameful behavior, and to devote the rest of your life to seeking redemption through good acts.
The anger over what happened may never stop, and the victims may never fully heal or never fully recover, but telling the truth, admitting wrong doing, and dedicating your life to seeking redemption through good acts is more respectable than those who are lying, deceiving, or not being truthful, and it’s way more respectable than being proud of sexual harassment.
- Tech pundit Scoble faces harassment claims
- Google this is heartbreaking if the allegations are true, why would you do this to women?
- Silicon Valley needs to give Women Equal Respect.
- A list of Women in VR, AR, or Tech groups on Facebook
American’s expect Trump to die. Any reasonable person today will be surprised if the most famous serial sexual harasser, the illegitimate President Donald Trump actually survives to finish his first term in office. JFK was the 4th President to be killed in office and a lot of people believe that Trump will the be the 5th President to be killed in office. If he isn’t impeached first.
Heroic Women are outing sexual harassers and rocking global industries (Movies, VR & AR, Science… was originally published in Silicon Valley Global News SVGN.io on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
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